Funny Things

Paul says that we have the funniest children ever. I believe that he thinks this because he hears the happenings of my days, and doesn't actually experience them. I'm grateful for his outlook on life. It helps to lighten things when I call to tell him he needs to come home from work because I need to sit in the closet by myself for a few minutes. I then proceed to tell him what has happened that day and explain to him why he needs to come home. For example if I don't run in the morning I usually have to wait until Elin is down for her morning nap to get in the shower. We moved the computer into the playroom recently, but before that I would put the three older kids in the playroom and shut the gate so they wouldn't leave the house while I was showering. Now that the computer is in there, I put on a show (Backyardigans is 24 minutes long--enough for shower and dress), leave the bedroom door open so I can hear if there's a serious problem, and take a quick shower. I had been doing this for a few weeks and things seemed to workout pretty well. Our house is pretty much baby proof. Anyway, a few days ago I did my routine. I got out of the shower and peeked around the corner and saw light streaming in from the front door. I grabbed pants and Paul's sweatshirt and ran to the front door. There stood Aislee saying, "They're going outside Mommy. I told them no." Ewan had my running shoes on and was attempting to "run" down the drive way. Olivia was half-way around the block. I chased after her, grabbed her little body, and ran back into the house. Ewan had returned the house. I think he knew he wasn't getting anywhere very fast and Mom was not gonna be very happy with him if he continued on his current path. We discussed strangers, cars, Olivia Pancakes, giant bugs that eat the toes off of little blond girls who leave their house without their mommy or daddy, and owey bodies. So I called Paul a few minutes after my heartrate had returned to normal (it takes a little while...I have issues). He said, "you should blog about it." Yeah, not-so-sure how to deal with this one. I guess, I could stop showering. But, let's be honest. Nobody wants that. So, I asked Paul to buy a deadbolt we could put on the door that's much higher than their reach. That's what we're gonna do about it! We laughed at it after he got home...Olivia will not be attending any dances in high school. She will no longer get to date until she has completed her master's degree in chemistry. I'm pretty sure Santa is bringing her coal...There are a lot more things to come because yes, we have funny kids!